My First Story Post

This one was done while listening to the Amelie du Montmarte soundtrack. Its quite moving really, the songs i mean, my story is crap. But still, i need to fill some space so here it is.
i felt overwhelmed just looking at her. Overwhelmed because of time. When I see something so beautiful, there is a innate animalistic desire to take it all in. To own it, to possess it. But sadly, she was too much. There was no way in hell that this girl could be owned. and the bigger part of me also knew that I didn't want to own her.

(Audrey Tautou, actress who played Amelie)

She was not bred for captivity. A kindred spirit no doubt, but one whose path matched my own. I had known many free spirits in my past. But they all had different journeys and sooner or later we found ourselves at loggerheads. With her, it was different. Her path was mine. Her expedition was not like the others. She did not desire familiarity or fixtures. She desperately wanted it of course. Who wouldn't?

But sometimes the things you want are not the things you need.

She wasn't my girl..its not like what they say in the movies i so madly loved. where the hero gets his girl in the end and they live happily ever after. i'd never get her and she'd never get me. we were just together? can i use such a word? we loved each other madly of course. but we knew of the mortal sin in trying to own each other. it just was not meant to be. when i was with other girls..i'd wake up sometimes in the morning and wonder where they'd be. what they'd be doing. i'd be scared. is today the day it ends? will she say she doesn't love me anymore?

i was insecure that way. i never found much in myself. i was lowly with no strength. till i found my path. my ascension or descent? to my role in this wierd funny and sometimes out right quirky universe. and with my role, i found a queen for this kingdom. when i woke up and she was not there with me i'd not wonder. mainly because i couldn't care. in some ironic way, she was inseperable from me.

i think deep down we all want that. to have someone who was made for us. someone we know loves us no matter what. someone..to whom we are everything. that feeling that our existence is special just because someone needs us. it wasn't that she was spectacularly beautiful. a few aquaintances of mine asked me, 'what do you see in her man?' to which i replied, 'for the fuck of me, i don't know but she is everything i need'